Englischreferat

Ich muss ein Referat über Australien halten und habe jetzt einen kleinen Text geschrieben. Es wäre nett, wenn der ein oder andere mal drüber gucken würde und Fehler erkennen würde.
At the East-Coast of Australia are many serious sights for tourists.

The state, which is in the Eastern Territory, is called Queensland. The

capital from Queensland is Sydney.

In Sydney is the Opera House, which looks like a shell. Also an

important sight is the Harbour Bridge. It was built at 19.03.1932. Also

it has got the name coat hanger. It is 503 meters long and 135

meters high. Also there is one of the biggest ports worldwide: The

Port Jackson. The Sydney Tower is very important, too, because you

can look about the whole city from this point, which is 305 meters

high. At Fort Dension was a prison in the middelages, but in the 19th

century it was a Fort to defend the Port Jackson and so Sydney. The

Kirribilli House is the house from the minister from Australia. It was

bulit in 1855.

There are lots of other buildings in Sydney, but they aren't as

important as the other.

Another attraction for tourists is the Great Barrier Reef. It is in the

North-East of Australia. You can surf there or go swimming in the

sea. But be careful of the sharks.

Most visitors in Australia come from New Zealand, Japan, the United

States and United Kingdom. In Australia are about 400 Airports, the

most important one is the Airport from Sydney.

Quelle: www.wikipedia.de + Australia from A to Z

Versuch auf jeden Fall (!) die Anzahl der Wörter "which" und "also" zu reduzieren!
Benutz andere (oder überhaupt) Konjunktionen. Dein Text wirkt sonst ziemlich abgehackt. Versuch also einzelne, vom Kontext her zusammengehörige Sätze zu verbinden. Z.B. mit: besides, furthermore, especially, mainly...etc.

Sorry für die relative knappe Übersicht, zu mehr reicht die Zeit leider grade nicht, werd mich bei Gelegenheit/Bedarf aber nochmal dransetzen
Welche Klassenstufe/Schulform besuchst du denn?

P.S.: Wenns nur ein Referat ist, ist die "Abgehacktheit" der Sätze natürlich egal, wenn du in der Lage bist während dem Vortrag auch frei zu erzählen. Wenn nicht, nimm meine Tipps oben besser wahr

Viele Grüße

Hier mal meine verbesserte version aber auch hier kein gewähr

At the East-Coast of Australia there are many [serious?] beautiful sights for tourists.

The state, which is in the Eastern Territory, is called Queensland. The

capital from Queensland is Sydney.

In Sydney there is the Opera House, which looks like a shell. The Harbour Bridge, which was built at the 19th march in 1932, is also a sight tourists should have seen.
It is also called Coat Hanger. It is 503 meters long and 135

meters high. There is also one of the biggest ports worldwide: The

Port Jackson. The Sydney Tower, which is 305 meters high, is amazing, too, because if you stood on it you would be able to look at the whole city from above.

At Fort Dension there was a prison in the middelages, but in the 19th

century it was a fort to defend the Port Jackson and Sydney. The

Kirribilli House is the house from the minister from Australia. It was

bulit in 1855.

There are lots of other buildings in Sydney, but they aren't as

important as these.

Another attraction for tourists is the Great Barrier Reef. It is in the

North-East of Australia. You can surf there or swim in the

sea but you have to be careful of the sharks.

Most visitors in Australia come from New Zealand, Japan, the United

States and United Kingdom. In Australia there are about 400 Airports, the

most important one is the Airport from Sydney.

navaronek hat folgendes geschrieben:

Hier mal meine verbesserte version aber auch hier kein gewähr At the East-Coast of Australia there are many [serious?] beautiful sights for tourists. The state, which is in the Eastern Territory, is called Queensland. The capital of Queensland is Sydney. In Sydney there is the Opera House, which looks like a shell. The Harbour Bridge, which was built at the 19th march in 1932, is also a sight tourists should have seen. It is also called Coat Hanger. It is 503 meters long and 135 meters high. There is also one of the biggest ports worldwide: The Port Jackson. The Sydney Tower, which is 305 meters high, is amazing, too, because if you stood on it you would be able to look at the whole city from above. At Fort Dension there was a prison in the middelages, but in the 19th century it was a fort to defend the Port Jackson and Sydney. The Kirribilli House is the house of the minister from Australia. It was bulit in 1855. There are lots of other buildings in Sydney, but they aren't as important as these. Another attraction for tourists is the Great Barrier Reef. It is in the North-East of Australia. You can surf there or swim in the sea but you have to be careful of the sharks. Most visitors in Australia come from New Zealand, Japan, the United States and United Kingdom. In Australia there are about 400 Airports, the most important one is the Airport of Sydney.

ich hab nur einmal schnell drübergelesen!

shishAFI hat folgendes geschrieben:

navaronek hat folgendes geschrieben: Hier mal meine verbesserte version aber auch hier kein gewähr At the East-Coast of Australia there are many [serious?] beautiful sights for tourists. The state, which is in the Eastern Territory, is called Queensland. The capital of Queensland is Sydney. There are some sights, wicht tourists visit, when they are in Sydney For example The Sydney Tower, which is 305 meters high, is amazing, because if you stood on it you have got an great view above the city and their sights. Like the Opera House, which looks like a shell. Or the Harbour Bridge, which is also called the Coat Hanger and was built in 1932. it is 503 meters long and 135 meters high. There is also one of the biggest ports worldwide: The Port Jackson. At Fort Dension there was a prison in the middelages, but in the 19th century it was a fort to defend the Port Jackson and Sydney. The Kirribilli House is the house of the minister from Australia. It was bulit in 1855. There are lots of other buildings in Sydney, but they aren't as important as these. Another attraction for tourists is the Great Barrier Reef. It is in the North-East of Australia. You can surf there or swim in the sea but you have to be careful of the sharks. Most visitors in Australia come from New Zealand, Japan, the United States and United Kingdom. In Australia there are about 400 Airports, but the most important one is the Airport of Sydney. ich hab nur einmal schnell drübergelesen!

Hab ein bisschen die Satztstruktur geändert, damit der Text ein bisschen flüssiger wird...muss aber auch noch Hausaufgaben machen, wer weitermachen will...Viel Spaß

Ich guck mir das heute Abend gerne nochmal an wenn ich Zeit finde. Aber eine Kleinigkeit sollte ich dir besser jetzt schon mal sagen...!
Sydney ist nicht die Haupstadt von Queensland. Das ist Brisbane. Sydney liegt in New South Wales.

Ich hab deinen Text mal ein wenig überarbeitet. Ich weiß allerdings nicht ob es vielleicht etwas zu viel war.
Vielleicht hilft es dir ja...

_______________________________________________________
At the east coast of Australia you can find many attractive sights for tourists.
The state in the south-east of the country is called New South Wales whose capital is Sydney. In Sydney is the famous Opera House, which looks like a giant shell, as well as the huge Sydney Harbour Bridge. The Harbour Bridge was built in 1932 and is nicknamed "The Coathanger". It is 503 meters long and 135 meters high. Sydney has also one of the biggest ports worldwide: Port Jackson. Another famous attraction of the city is the 305 meter high Sydney Tower from wich you have a fantastic view on the whole city.
Fort Dension used to be a prison in the Middle Ages, but in the 19th
century it became a Fort to defend Sydney and its Port Jackson. The
Kirribilli House is the home of the Australian Prime Minister. It was
bulit in 1855. Those are the most important buildings of the city.

Another famous tourist attraction is the Great Barrier Reef in the
north-east of Australia where you can surf and swim but always have to be aware of sharks.

Most visitors in Australia come from New Zealand, Japan, the United
States and the United Kingdom. In Australia are about 400 Airports, but the
most important is Sydney Airport.

Beckz7 hat folgendes geschrieben:

Ich hab deinen Text mal ein wenig überarbeitet. Ich weiß allerdings nicht ob es vielleicht etwas zu viel war. Vielleicht hilft es dir ja... _______________________________________________________ At the east coast of Australia you can find many attractive sights for tourists. The state in the south-east of the country is called New South Wales whose capital is Sydney. In Sydney is the famous Opera House, which looks like a giant shell, as well as the huge Sydney Harbour Bridge. The Harbour Bridge was built in 1932 and is nicknamed "The Coathanger". It is 503 meters long and 135 meters high. Sydney has also one of the biggest ports worldwide: Port Jackson. Another famous attraction of the city is the 305 meter high Sydney Tower from wich you have a fantastic view on the whole city. Fort Dension used to be a prison in the Middle Ages, but in the 19th century it became a Fort to defend Sydney and its Port Jackson. The Kirribilli House is the home of the Australian Prime Minister. It was bulit in 1855. Those are the most important buildings of the city. Another famous tourist attraction is the Great Barrier Reef in the north-east of Australia where you can surf and swim but always have to be aware of sharks. Most visitors in Australia come from New Zealand, Japan, the United States and the United Kingdom. In Australia are about 400 Airports, but the most important is Sydney Airport.

Nciht schlecht der Text. Respekt! Würde ich glaub ich nicht so hinkriegen. Die Frage ist jtetzt nur in welcher Klasse Solingen ist, denn wenn er in der 8. oder 9. ist fällt es wohlmöglich auf, dass der nicht ganz aus seiner Feder kam
Beckz, hast du denn beruflich etwas mit Englisch zu tun? Zur Schule gehst du ja glaub ich nicht mehr

Hab ich danach auch gedacht. Auf den ersten Blick könnte er wirklich so 8./9. Klasse sein. Dann wäre es Unsinn solch einen Text vorzulegen, da hast du Recht. Dann würde es reichen einfach die Grammatik- und Wortfehler zu korrigieren.

Ich bin in der Ausbildung und habe nicht direkt etwas mit Englisch zu tun. Ich interessiere mich aber sehr für die USA und die englische Sprache. Mein Onkel lebt in LA und les und guck desöfteren englische Bücher und Filme. Reise auch gerne mal über den großen Teich und war auch schon auf Austausch dort. Hat also mehr was mit generellem Interesse zu tun.

Ich hab nochmal eben ne weniger veränderte Version gemacht. Hab versucht die Grammatik- und Rechtschreibfehler rauszuholen. Hoffe, das ist mir einigermaßen gelungen.

Solingen hat folgendes geschrieben:

At the east-coast of Australia are many attractive sights for tourists. One of the eastern states is called New South Wales. The capital of New South Wales is Sydney. In Sydney is the Opera House, which looks like a shell. Another important sight is the Harbour Bridge. It was built in 1932. It has also got the nickname "The Coatanger". It is 503 meters long and 135 meters high. In Sydney is also one of the biggest ports worldwide: The Port Jackson. The 305 meter high Sydney Tower is very important, too, because you have a view over the whole city from its top. Fort Dension was a prison in the middelages, but in the 19th century it was a Fort to defend Sydney and Port Jackson. The Kirribilli House is the house of the Prime Minister of Australia. It was built in 1855. There are lots of other buildings in Sydney, but they are not as important as these sights. Another attraction for tourists is the Great Barrier Reef. It is in the north-east of Australia. There you can go surfing and swimming in the sea. But be aware of the sharks. Most people visiting Australia come from New Zealand, Japan, the United States and United Kingdom. In Australia are about 400 Airports, but the most important one is the Airport of Sydney. Quelle: www.wikipedia.de + Australia from A to Z

Naja wie schon vermutet bin ich in der 9. Klasse und musste es heute abgeben. Habe es so abgegeben, wie ich es in meinem nfangspost geschrieben habe, außer im letzten Satz mit dem Airport of und from

Könnte mir nochmal schnell jemand erklären, wann man was verwendet

Solingen hat folgendes geschrieben:

Naja wie schon vermutet bin ich in der 9. Klasse und musste es heute abgeben. Habe es so abgegeben, wie ich es in meinem nfangspost geschrieben habe, außer im letzten Satz mit dem Airport of und from Könnte mir nochmal schnell jemand erklären, wann man was verwendet

@ Beckz: Wer das Geld hat mal eben über den großen Teich zu reisen...Warum nicht?

@Solingen: Eine Regel kann ich dir ejtzt nicht genau nennen. Gibt es da überaupt eine? Ich mach das eigtl nur nach Sprachgefühl. Lasse mich da aber gerne belehren, wenn es da eine Regel gibt.

Nebenbei kann ich dir aber folgende Seite empfehlen: http://www.englisch-hilfen.de/ Dort wird Grammatik gut erklärt und sind auch sofort Übungen bei.

Solingen hat folgendes geschrieben:

Naja wie schon vermutet bin ich in der 9. Klasse und musste es heute abgeben. Habe es so abgegeben, wie ich es in meinem nfangspost geschrieben habe, außer im letzten Satz mit dem Airport of und from Könnte mir nochmal schnell jemand erklären, wann man was verwendet

naja from=aus (he's from australia)
of=von (he's the president of the united states)

Solingen hat folgendes geschrieben:

Naja wie schon vermutet bin ich in der 9. Klasse und musste es heute abgeben. Habe es so abgegeben, wie ich es in meinem nfangspost geschrieben habe, außer im letzten Satz mit dem Airport of und from Könnte mir nochmal schnell jemand erklären, wann man was verwendet

Ne sprachlich korrekt formulierte Regel hab ich auch nicht. Aber ich habs so gelernt, dass es "from" heißt, wenn sich etwas von Punkt A nach Punkt B BEWEGT.
"of" nimmt man demnach, wenn etwas zu etwas dazugehört, so wie hier der airport of Sydney.

Besser kann ichs auch nicht sagen